In class
one day, the students become distraught over one particular student's
penchant for monopolizing classroom discussion. This student is
Gunnar the German LLM (played by Dan Currell '97), who cannot
help but raise his hand at every possible moment and interrupt
other students at every turn. When asked why he feels that he
has to dominate every class, Gunnar responds with his anthem,
"I Will Reply."
Gunnar's Reply
To the tune of "I Will Survive"
At first I was afraid, I was petrified . . .
When I heard my name in class I tried to run and hide.
I stuttered and I stammered and I got the answers wrong--
But I grew strong, I learned how to carry on.
So you came back to call on me
You asked me Rule 11 and I answered 15(c),
Too late to change my answer and too soon to rush the door
I opened up my mouth and rambled half an hour more!
So now when I get the chance I volunteer
I shout out from the front row even when the answer's clear
I never seem to tire of the sweet and soothing ring
Of my irritating voice and my constant babbling
Oh no not I! I will reply!
For as long as there's a question I will raise my hand up high!
I can lecture you on Hand
I might mention Adarand
I will reply, I will reply, Ja Ja!
It took all the strength I had just not to come undone,
But I ended up monopolizing Civ Pro I.
I argued with professors in a shrill, insulting tone,
And now I'm proud--to speak my mind out loud!
So now in Elements I interrupt again,
It might be Wittgenstein or Federalist Number 10
Or Rylands versus Fletcher versus Audley versus Jee
The point is not the subject if the subject isn't me!
So when I can, I volunteer
I shout out from the front row even when the answer's clear
I never seem to tire of the sweet and soothing ring
Of my irritating voice and my constant babbling
Oh no not I! I will reply!
Even when there is no question I will raise my hand up high!
From Antonin's dissents
To The Cost of Accidents
I will reply, I will reply, I will reply!!
Lyrics by Steve Hasegawa (ca. 1997)
Charlie and the Law Factory
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